Times like these

An Age of Embarrassment

In light of recent news, which I will get to later, I am about to engage in a rant-n-rave about the rights of the people and the regulatory actions taken by the government to limit our rights, as human beings. Let us start off with the first topic, and probably the most heated debate you heard in the past election:

“Marriage was intended to be between a man and a woman.”

If you are going to use history to justify why a person cannot marry someone of the same sex, then use it fully, not just in the context you intend to propagate.

Marriage, The Origins

Long before peoples joined together to form tribes and towns and governing bodies, nobody got married. You found someone who was willing to take it or give it so that you could have some people around the cave to help you hunt buffalo. As humans gathered together in tribes they began to realize the need for defining limits. Cavemen would steal each others animals and furs and in retaliation, you’d get a boulder dropped on you. At first, this was all “O-B-K-B” and nobody said a word (chances are you’d get smacked by a tree). At some point, the strongest of the strong stood up and said, “Stop killing, we need hunters and fighters, not dead bodies.”

From this humans began to realize they had to work together. A few stages into the evolution of a nation we find ourselves looking to a higher power for answers that nobody could agree on. One idea was spread around, then another and not long afterwards there were hundreds of ideas. Where did we come from? What happens at birth or death? When a group of people became worried about not finding the right answer, they began to band together. The more people that surrounded them and believed in the same origins and end results of life, the more comfortable they felt.

Religion is born.

Before I get too much into religion, which happens to be another topic I need to update on this page, let me jump ahead a couple thousand years to the point where people started to develop governing bodies.

Originally, governing bodies were put in place to regulate the belief systems of a people. The educated convinced the layman’s that the “Higher Power” spoke to them and set forth laws by which to abide. This is the point where marriage becomes an “institution.” All around these villages you could see the clear separation between the rich and educated and the poor and foolish. The rich wanted no part in the lives of the poor, so they all agreed, only marry those who are as wealthy or more wealthy.

Blood lines are now established.

At this point, marriage became regulated which made it a “sin” to marry outside of the “class” you were born into. God put you on this Earth to serve a purpose and it is his intention that you and your family and your people serve this purpose until God himself says otherwise.

Fast forward to Ancient Rome and introducing, the engagement ring.

The engagement ring came into place during the times of Ancient Rome. The circle shape of the ring became a profound statement to the man and woman that this marriage was to last for all of eternity. Uber-sweet.

1500’s and a pissed off Church

Prior to the 1500’s there wasn’t always a ceremony to celebrate and mark the beginning of a marriage. Until then, only the wealthy could afford such lavish celebrations for something that was viewed as “the next logical step in life.” By this time in history, man had made the correlation of marriage between a man and woman to Jesus and the church. Many took this as a sign that Jesus intended marriage to be this way and only this way. The fact is, Jesus said nothing more than – “Don’t fuck your boy’s wife.”

Anyways, to ensure that marriages were done in accordance with the rules set forth by the religious government, a priest and two witnesses must be present at all marriages and a certificate will be provided to mark the occasion as legitimate.

Don’t forget how much Socrates loved his men. Fast forward to the 19^th Century.

America realizes that religion is a powerful influence, hence the founding of America. To curb the growing influence of the religious parties, we decided to curb them in their endeavors and we separated religious and government bodies (as to not repeat the very persecution we ran from). Don’t forget this.

Present Day

George W. Bush says, “God did not intend marriage to be between peoples of the same sex.” Regardless of whether or not God did or did not say this, we mustn’t forget some major flaws with the President saying this:

1. Separation of Church and State?
1. Even if God said this, God is not the governing body. The elected officials are.
2. If God says men can’t marry men, then why can I go through a drive through window in Las Vegas and get married to a half conscious, drunk hooker?
3. God didn’t say this. Man did.
4. I’ve devoted my entire life to being with someone, man or woman. When my life is getting near its end, I draw up my Last Will and Testament and leave everything to my partner. If the government issues me a marriage certificate then I am not taxed on the inheritance. Without the certificate, you get taxed at the luxury rate of 44%.
5. Want to oversee a wedding and stand in as the priest? Take this online test and for $9.95 you can legally wed a couple!!
1. I cannot begin to speak on this without first exploding from the anger that arises as a result of the hypocrisy.
   

Let us revisit that first quote I mentioned: “Marriage was intended to be between a man and a woman.”

Now let’s modify this quote and strip out all of the bullshit. Let us say exactly what this sentence wants to say:

“Marriage is my way of keeping you away from me and a way to keep your kind from infecting my perfect people and family.”

I think that’s what they really wanted to say. The uptight, Hitlerish Elitist that this President has become is on the verge of becoming the next man to start a genocide, against homosexuals (who happen to be homosapiens first). The fact of the matter is George W. uses Catholocism as a soapbox. He knows that people who are devoted to a religion, devote their lives to that belief system. In essence, he knows that those people are casting votes to a religious ideal rather than a "Who do you want to run this country" ideal. I guess he learned one thing in between snorting lines at Yale, preach to the masses.

I have trouble focusing on this topic because the root of the topic is not simply religious. The entire foundation of a society and the implementation of a government (can you tell I'm a consultant?) is in question when you make broad-sweeping remarks that a private institution can and should be regulated by the public.

Are you comfortable allowing the government to regulate who can and cannot get married?

Before you answer the question, consider this. Precedence is what determines 75% of all laws and rulings. The first thing an attorney does before they ponder a defense, is look for precedent. Did a judge rule in our favor in the past for a similar case? If so, the presiding judge must take that case and its ruling into consideration when contemplating the current case. This "Law of Precedence" was set in place for two reasons:

1. To protect the power and influence of a judge who was elected by his people.

2. It's logical. The law cannot give clear cut details on every unique detail, therfore the translation is where precedence can come into play. If precedence is not considered, the previous cases must be reconsidered for fairness.

Now consider this. If we allow the government to regulate an institution that is regulated also by the church, who has the real power here? Also, once allowed to regulate a religious event, who is to say that precedence won't stand when the government prevents the poor from baptizing their babies? Or sending their children to Sunday School? Or buying a red car and painting your house yellow?

Once you allow the government to regulate your personal life, lawyers and lawmakers will find a way to use The Law of Precedence to regulate everything else. It's very easy to appeal to the masses because you show them only what you want them to see. The general mass of people don't want to think for themeselves. They work too much, sleep too little and don't have time for politics. They want more money and less crime so their kids can play in the front yard while they drink a bottle of wine. When our current president focuses his entire campaign around such topics of religious debate, he gets the conservative population so heated up, they become blind to reality and fail to see the underlying intent.

President George W. Bush does not care if Jared marries Jack. He doesn't care if the two of them engage in sex 11 times a day. He cares that if Jared marries Jack, then Jared and Jack pay less to the government in taxes. He cares that if married, Jared and Jack pay less in health insurance, get better mortgage rates and car loans. Bush doesn't care about the people that are devastated by such hatred and blatant discrimination. Bush cares about his multi-billion dollar industry that relies solely his name. If people hear Bush supports Same Sex Marriage, they'll pull investments and look elsewhere.

If you're looking for a plain and straight forward way to describe marriage, then take this:

“...marriage is a bond between two people that involves responsibility and legalities, as well as commitment and challenge.”

This was written by an old married couple that thinks marriage has been mutated from a beautiful and meaningful statement of love into a dirty, tax-lobbying whore. This statement says nothing of love or children or bonding.


How do you view marriage?

Marriage to me is a vow, a promise; to devote my life to my partner. To ensure their safety, happiness and well being. To join together with a person and make our world around us a better place. Marriage to me is security, strength, and comfort.

To be continued...

posted by David Malloy @ 11:17 AM 0 Comments

What is a Christian?

What is it that makes one a Christian? I understand that one is to undertake specific beliefs such as Jesus Christ being the son of God, but there are a lot of unanswered questions that I'm looking to solve.

First off, let us look at the first 5 chapters of the Old Testament, which are holy to the Jews, Christians and Muslims. These books are included in the Bible, Torah, and Koran (Qur'an). The first book, Genesis, tells of God (aka Yahweh or Jehovah) creating the world in 6 days, and resting on the 7th.

Is this why we have a 7 day week?

Also in this book is the story of the first two humans, Adam and then Eve. It is said that Adam was brought to life from the Earth and Eve from the rib of Adam. This is why females have one more set of ribs than males.

Science is, in essence, the enemy of Christianity since much of the ideas of Divine Creation are countered with evolution and the Big Bang Theory (anti-matter vs matter).

The first sin was Eve taking fruit from the Tree of Conscience. The tree contained fruit that would provide awareness of Good and Evil, however, would result in eventual death. The punishment for eating from this forbidden tree was mortality to humans and childbirth for woman.

Does this mean that both Adam and Eve were hermaphrodites at one point until God tipped the scale?

The Earth became full of wicked (not the kind of "wicked" that I use) people. God spoke to Noah, a truly righteous man and told him to build an ark that could house his family and 2 of every bird, mammal and reptile. Rain poured down for 40 days and 40 nights (Lent) and the only survivors were those on the ark. God promised never to flood the Earth again after Noah and his 3 sons repopulated the Earth.

This would explain why some people are so frigin' retarded, we are all children of incest?!?

At one point man began to build the Tower of Babel to prove mankind's power. In order to prevent this, God gave man different languages.

Did God spearhead the building of a human accomplishment? Does this mean God is responsible for wars that are the cause of cultural difference? Touch situation eh?

Abram is the next prominent figure in this book. Abram, soon to become known as Abraham (meaning "Father of Nations") fathered children with his wife Sarai (now Sarah meaning "Princess"). The first child was Isaac (meaning "He Laughs") and Isaac was asked to be sacrificed to God. Abraham agreed but before he killed his son, God stopped the sacrifice and allowed Abraham to sacrifice a ram.

So we used to sacrifice humans and animals when we were in dialogue with God, now we don't. Does that mean we are no longer in God's favor since he does not "speak" to us and tell us to sacrifice living creatures? Even scarier a thought is do some believe the act of murdering the unwise and unknowing to be an act of sacrifice to God? YIKES!

Now, if we continue down this road to the other remaining books (Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy [loose translation meaning "Second Law"]) we will never get to the point. Currently we have walked through the major points of the First Holy Book for three Major Religions, Jeudaism, Christianity, Islaam. We find that the roots are the same.

Ever wonder why the Catholic Pope wears a Yamakah?

Well I sure do wonder.

To be continued...

posted by David Malloy @ 10:25 AM 0 Comments

The Art of "Enjoi"

In a life with very little stability, you'll find yourself looking for exactly that. To me, it was a never-ending conundrum without a solution, no end in sight; a Catch-22 if you will.

How can you hold onto something if you are in a constant state of movement?

The answer to this question didn't just dawn on me one morning after hearing the birds chirp to the rising sun, and the dew on the pine needles globulating and falling to their friends below. The answer didn't come to me after reading a book on philosophy or religion; and for that matter the answer didn't come to me from going to church (although one may dispute whether or not He had a hand in this).

I have been looking for stability in all of the wrong places until now. As I look at this panda I see a story, I see a life of shame, yet I see beauty. The more I looked at this panda, the more I saw, until one day, I found the origins of this image.

Enjoi

At some point in my life I became rather tired of hearing the same shit over and over again...

Life is not easy.

Why can't life be easy, I say. Why is everything supposed to be about struggle and perseverance? Why can I not find something I truly love, hold onto it, and just be happy? I refuse to believe that "Life is not easy." There are certainly some things in life that are difficult to handle, like the loss of a loved one, or crossing the Sahara without water. Those acts are not by any sense of the word, easy. This is why I chose to work on this commonly used cliche and update it to my way of thinking...

Enjoi Life

Isn't that much better? I see this and I start to feel a little smile grow on my face. Looking at this and reading this just makes me happy. I don't get that reaction when I read "Life is not easy." That shit is too sad for me.

So what exactly is this thought process you ask? Why don't I just tell you. When you hear me say "enjoi," and you will hear me say this often; this is exactly what you are hearing.

Life is a very long journey that appears to always be on the verge of ending. Negativity and pessimism surround us on a daily basis. TV news is 55 minutes of fear, death, and war, while the last 5 minutes is a story of a war survivor or cancer survivor. That shit is just plain sad.

To counter this sadness and gloominess, I think about how lucky I am to be watching any TV at all. I think about how lucky I am to have intelligent thoughts derived from a college degree. I even now think about how lucky I am to be typing out these thoughts smoothly, on a laptop, in my apartment.

It wasn't all that long ago that I was unsure if college was in my future, and I certainly wasn't concerned with a dramatic society that is hell-bent on depressing us all. TV? How about MTV. Laptop? No sir. Each and every one of these things became a luxury at some point. After focusing on necessities for so long, I was able to realize how utterly blessed I must be at this point.

I do not own the right to complain about my life status. When I think about how I got here, I can't help but smile. I can't help but enjoi the path that brought me here.

How can I not smile? I have friends who were willing to lay down their lives for me. Their families became my own. A job that allows me to live in a beautiful apartment, and a girlfriend who will become my fiance, and eventually my wife, my family.

Enjoi Love

Family, friends and love... what else can you ask for? You work 70 hours in one week, you're exhausted. You hate your boss because he doesn't pay you enough. You hate everyone around you because they work 35-40 hours, eat dinner at home every night and even go out in the middle of the week to have some Jack/Black & Cokes and a twist of lime. You forget to pay bills because weeks blend into moments. You have eye crust from 3 weeks ago, which happens to be the last time you slept a full night. **Frustrated yet?** Think of it this way...

What are you actually stressed over? What is the real reason you are upset? I truly doubt you are upset because your boss doesn't pay you enough and you feel that you work too much. The root of this, sometimes obvious to us all, is that we feel undervalued, as if we were bright shining stars at one point that were hidden behind a rotating moon. We have a right to be upset, we always have the right to feel emotion. Feel that emotion, let it run through your system. Think about the cause of that emotion, when did this feeling start? Walk through a series of images that led to this event and pay attention to each image as it comes into fruition.

By the time you actually get to that point, the point at which you realize the cause of this stress, you will more than likely find out one thing...

I just wasted all of that time for what? I missed out on a world of beauty for those few moments. Leaves blew across a freshly cut lawn and towards a wrinkly pond while a young woman and her dog jogged by. The leaf rolled up over the curb and with a quick burst of a breeze, the leaf found itself airborn and twisting towards the pond. What images do you create in your mind when you think of this? What emotion does this derive? Do you feel the world becoming lighter and more clear? Can you breath any easier?

You may not be able to now, but you will. You'll start to realize that you should feel emotion, however, you should ensure you do not dwindle on all emotions; especially the shitty ones. It's ok to be angry, let the emotion flow and don't try to stop it. The stress created when you try to prevent emotion will only lead to more stress.

Let life flow. Let love flow. The world is much bigger than we realize and we only have so much time on this beautiful Earth. Have you seen Rome yet? Have you been back to the land where your family is from? Have you been on a relaxing vacation with your loved ones? Have you been camping, canoeing? When was the last time you sat in a hammock? The last time you went apple picking? Hiking? Swimming?

Stop reading and go enjoi life.

posted by David Malloy @ 9:01 AM 0 Comments

Defining Moments

We watch Bravo, ABC, CBS, or even some late night show with the new hottest Celeb in town going on and on about the one defining moment in their life when they realized, "this is what I want to do..."

Riiiiiiiiight!

We've heard every story from the broken home to the orphan, to the immigrant "making it in America" story. Yet, I cannot find myself wondering if I, The Professor Himself, has a defining moment that lead me down the long and narrow path that I am currently bushwacking. The sad reality is this; I do have that defining moment lurking behind me at every turn. The other sad reality is that I have not, until recently, been able to identify said moment.

I can't sleep very well at night. My job drives me homicidal. My hotel room is never cold enough. Mexican food makes my tummy growl. I can't breath if I sleep on my stomach.

Good God! Am I 90 years old yet? Did I mention I've broken bones 23 times?

Ah, I see. It's not that I suffer from innumerable ailments, it's that I cannot stop thinking. I think too much, all day and all night. I've even heard a couple of you all mention this to me. After commenting on a rather lame news event with a didactic epilogue, I often here these now famous words, "Dave, you think too much." Could it be true? Do I not know when to shut up? Or, is everyone not thinking enough? I tend to believe the latter is, in fact, a farce.

Before I divulge too much into THAT line of thought, allow me to get back on track.

My defining moment, the one point in my life that defines who I am and why I have become the man, yes man, that I am today.

Winter 2000. Shit.

By this point the volcano had been brewing for months, hell, it had been brewing for years. I was living in Connecticut with my newly born baby brother Matthew. My mother and step-father had brought me to this demonic state after Peter (the step-father) had decided to make a jump in his career. He spent nearly 25 years living in Fishkill, NY and working nearby. However, after wedding my mother only a few years prior, he decided to take his newly acquired family out of New York and back to New England.

As you may have heard, I moved around, a lot. This move to CT was not about leaving friends because I was used to that.

Anyways. I found myself at a less desirable high school with 400lb boys threatening to tear my wholesome 150lb body into shreds if my locker door touched theirs again. Yikes! I spoke with friends on the phone every night trying to pick up tips on how to take down a heffer in one move. The consensus was, no chance in hell.

Punch him in the nuts and run.

Move to Russia and take up boxing and hope he doesn't find you. Another one of my more aggressive friends decided to install this tumor-like thought that I, if willing, could end a fight before it started. He taught me the art of handling a knife properly. I learned on buck knives (the type you gut animals with) and he taught me on a butterfly knife (oh yes!). Within a couple weeks I had become rather proficient, as I previously had some experience with this toy.

I dropped the two knives in my bag and carried not just knives to school, but confidence. No longer did Big Ralph's pestering bother me. I knew that if he ever came at me, it would be a wrong move. With my dazzling speed and ninja like movements, I could scare him off without having to use said weaponry.

English class. Junior Year of High School. I corrected the teacher one too many times. On this particular day, I was sent to the nurse for emitting an odor that would kill a herd of longhorns. The end result was food poisoning and expulsion. EXPULSION! WTF! Oh yes. This teacher heard a clinking sound in my bag and took this opportunity to search my bag, illegally.

The knives were found, and on the day of the CT Track and Field State Championships, I was ushered away as the No. 3 high jumper in the state and
nothing more than a shallow criminal. Shit.

I was expelled from school. Locked in the house, and home taught by Adjunct
professors from UCONN. Every day my mother looked at me and shook her head. She
told me daily that I made her sick. Thanks.

In the end, I was learning at a ridiculous rate since I had no boundaries or limits. I wasn't in "a grade," rather I was learning whatever I could absorb. With no kids and no sports to distract me, I focused on school. I read a different book every other day. I penciled out Accounting spreadsheets at blinding speed and even got a little ahead of myself when I was directed to UCONN to take an Accounting Final with college students to assess the effectiveness of my tutor. The results were nothing short of my excessively high standards. I finished the test in 45
minutes and had 2 issues with accrued interest over a progressive loan of 5 years. Boo.

Summer 2000. Now we're back to where we started.

Being the "criminal" that I was, my mother could not stand to look at me. I worked in my room, where my baby brother slept, and never left. I cooked dinner, ate alone, and did the dishes after my step-father and mother went downstairs to relax in the living room. Once a week I was allowed to go for a run, as my mother didn't want me to think "it was a vacation." The plans at the time were to send me to another high school in which I would have to ride my bike because it would teach "me a lesson."

The school was 26 miles away. Yikes again!

I only had to make that trek 3 times. Reason being:

I snapped. I lost it. I was tired of the disrespect and I was ready to make my move. Only a year ago I had reconnected with my father, who had been a ghost in my life since I was 7 years old. I hadn't spoke or seen him in nearly 10 years. I found him in New Hampshire, right where my mother left him. After 10 years, it wasn't as if I was seeing my father for the first time, but meeting a new friend, a highly influential friend.

My father showed me around his town, Portsmouth, NH. He showed all of his work buddies and bar pals his son who he "hadn't seen in 10 years." He kept hugging me and crying everytime I met someone who said "Jeff! He looks just like you!"

Ok, I won't lie, I cried a lot too. It was friking sweet! My pappa-dukes was
back and he was better than ever.

At this point he was a master craftsman and was known around NH as "the guy who could fix anything."

I filled him in on my rather poopy situation at home and how I was in a "snapping mood." He offered me this:

"Your mother raised you and loved you every day of her life. She protected you, clothed you, fed you and taught you to be a gentleman. Do not lose that. Do not forget that. I don't care what she has done or will do, she will always love you as her son."

Great advice from the guy who I hadn't seen in 10 years, seriously. I took this to heart and tried to reconnect to my mother. No sir. When I returned back to CT, I found all of my belongings on the front porch with a brief note: "If you want to leave, be my guest."

Shit.

At this point I had two choices: Ignore the note and go inside OR call my friend from Panama and plead to let me live in her basement. I did the latter. 1 month later I filed a petition to change custody to my father. This has to be done if I wanted to go to High School since I need my parent's signature for everything. He told me that he would allow this under one condition:

"Go back to your NY High School. Graduate. Go to college. Get a good job. Make
yourself a family and never, ever, ever forget how you got there."

He made it clear that he did not want me to sever my relationship with my mother and the rest of my family as I would surely regret it every day of my life.

Winter 2001. The Renaissance.

So I moved back to NY and lived with friends, on couches. I had a lawyer get me back in high school after I was rejected twice (a whole new story). No class in that tiny high school was capable of holding me intellectually, so I took the basics to gradute. I took 7 Regents Exams in 3 days in an attempt to get my Regents Degree in Business (specialized NY High School Diploma).

3 days after taking the last test I got a call from a CT Probate Judge. My mother had countered my petition with an Emancipation Notice. In CT, after the age of 16, the parent can emancipate from the child if a notice is filed by the child first for either a change of custody or an emancipation. I consulted with my friends' families for weeks before returning to CT to see my mother and brother for the first time in 6 months. My mother looked as if she was buying groceries, expressionless. The judge asked for my response and I couldn't help it, I cried. I sucked up the swelling in my throat and spit out the response my mother was waiting for.

Spring 2001. The opportunity.

SUNY New Paltz was the only realistic college I applied to. I had no money to my name and a barrage of medical bills in collection. The college had agreed to give me a second look if I was able to fulfill some requirements: Write an essay about how I came to my situation, every semester. This essay had to be read to the Dean of Studies every semester to determine my ability to mature in a college situation. Obviously I would need full-time housing, which the school did not offer. The other requirement was to hold a job the entire time. If I couldn't balance a job and school, then I wasn't ready for school. Being 17, I had no choice but to agree to the terms if I wanted to go to college. The answer was simple. I joined the NY Air National Guard who would pay for my school and would fulfill the job requirement.

Sweet money!

What type of person would I be today if I just let everything go the way it had? Probably not a good person by any sense of the word. Every semester I called my mother and attempted to apologize, make amends, do whatever it took to get her back in my life, in some form. Every attempt was futile. She wanted nothing to do with me. I couldn't blame her. My brother was only 14 years old when he was sent to a specialized school that could "handle his ADD." This was utter bullshit as she didn't want to deal with it herself, and the reality is, he was too much like my father as a child. My mother hated this about my brother, and distanced herself. I loved my brother. Still do. He is in Florida evading arrest in NH for a warrant on drug possessions. Drugs that he was introduced to at these "specialized" schools. She put him in a situation that could do nothing to better him.

Studying Sociology was my only outlet to understanding why my life was the way it was. How did the people around me affect me? Was my mother who she was because of her surroundings? Fallacies. Sociology does not explain why an individual is who they are, it explains how society is and came to be.

I had to learn this on my own. No professor or friend can teach this to you.

The last 6 years of my life I have spent living on couches, working 2-3 jobs to make rent and food for the summer and winter breaks. I was lucky to visit my father in NH once or twice a year. I ate ramen three times a day, drank water, and hid my past from everyone. I didn't want pity, I didn't want people thinking I was the product of an awkward situation. I wanted to be my own person. I didn't want people attributing my success to some sap ass story about the kid pulling himself out of destitution. It wasn't true. I had friends who gave up their lives for me. Their parents became my extended family. I was lucky as shit. How many people in my situation would have had an opportunity to graduate college, let a lone high school?

2006. The finale.

The final curtain has risen and I have now become a self sustaining man. I hold a full-time career and an apartment. I plan on marrying my girlfriend of nearly 5 years and making every day of our lives the happiest day of her life. I want to raise 2 healthy and happy children who grow to love and learn. I want to spend time with family and friends, make people smile and touch lives. I want people to focus on the foreground not the background. Look at me for who I am, not what I did. The past is the past, it is past.

I'll leave you with my senior quote, never published since I wasn't in a senior yearbook.

"There will come a time when the picking will no longer become picked."

It doesn't send your mind into a whirl, and it's not supposed to. The design is to leave you with one thought and one thought only... and it's probably not what you think... is it? You'll have to find out later.

posted by David Malloy @ 9:50 AM 1 Comments

A story to help you sleep at night...

This is a conversation I had with a friend on GTalk... instead of editing this conversation, I'm going to keep it in its entirety, for the most part. I really hope you enjoi this story. The names in this story have been changed to protect the identity of the speakers.. except me.. I'm Dave.

Preeti: dude
duuuuude
Dave: whattup chica
Preeti: insane yo
inSANE
*INSANE&
INSANE
Dave: agreed
AGREED
Preeti: everything is coming together to screw us so bad
Dave: i just want to run and hide
take PTO for a month and forget about everything, come back when it's all fixed
Preeti: i know it's ridiculous and sad
hahahaha
hell yeah
and even our developers (-s as it's just one) are screwing us
guess who's work i have to fucking triple check
Dave: (name of perp)?
Preeti: yessir
i dont have TIME for that bullshit
Dave: sadness looms
this reminds me of a funny story
i hope it makes you laugh
Preeti: do tell

Dave: I took a "Juvenile Delinquency" class in college.. the professor was the Uncle of my good friend and Department Head and Advisor, Eve Waltermaurer....the Uncle was a probate lawyer for family court

very old school..stern as shit

Preeti: whoa....nuhhuh..

Dave: He would arrive to class on rainy days with rubber covers for his uber fancy shoes (although, he wasn\'t snobby, he was very protective of his belongings in a non-selfish way.. if at all possible)

everyday, rain or shine, he had is tea and umbrella with his 50 yr old suitcase. He was a pleasantly plump older man, 60's, chubby nose, curly and thick white hair

his glasses rested lazily on the tip of his chubby nose, not allowing them to fall, even while wandering up and down the classroom

He had very little experience with non-whites (surprising for a teacher/lawyer) and wasn't privy to Political Correct terms, or the new trend in America where Non Whites actually go to school (go figure)

his exposure in this class was an eye opener for him as many students got on his case for random insensitive (even though he had no intentions) comments. I felt bad for him b/c students would gang up on him when he said these things

you could see how new he was and how sorry he was for upsetting anyone

Anyways... he arrived one evening for class on a rainy day.. head hanging low, no umbrella in hand and no tea... his shoes though.. were still covered in his "booties" he slipped off his shoes and sat with his head in his hands.. I walked towards him to comfort him (having known him in an out of class) and asked what the problem was",

he looked up at me, soaked hair and face and said "I forgot my umbrella and spilled my tea on my new shirt that Eve got me for Easter, I just want to go home and cry."

It appeared, during this moment, that the students and the stress of teaching college had gotten to him and he wanted to give up and just never come back.

Preeti: okie...go on this is good

Dave: So we went through our 3 hr class, which was tough enough as is with this crowd. He had no energy and the class seemed to replicate that feeling. The rain fell and the quad became blackened with the night.

Class ended with no formal fairwells and students began to lazily pour into the hallway. The professor didn\'t budge at the passerby's and continued to stare at his table waiting for his tea to appear and for his stained shirt to be dry again

Preeti: right.

Dave: when everyone left I walked over to him and had a conversation about social awakenings, and dealing with people who you've never dealt with before, seeing as how I had this same awakening only 3 yrs earlier when I started school he made valid and thoughtful commentary as to how he felt he should've adjusted, b/c despite race, class, or gender . . . everyone is different and everyone provides you with a social awakening in one way or another

we spoke a bit more at Jazzmans, the local tea/coffee shop on campus as he outlined why he went into juvenile law including family and probate law. He said he truly wanted to unify people from different worlds and that he, after one bad semester, felt he had undone all of the good he ever did.

Preeti : wow
Dave: he left me with one message that sticks strong.. I even think about it when shit hits the fan here and on every project..
Preeti: do tell
Dave: Count your blessings twice.. one bad apple should never spoil the bunch
and if all else fails... drink whiskey, listen to louis armstrong, and tell everyone else to fuck off
the end
Preeti: hahahahah
nice!
would love to
let's get together
8/18
and just drink, bitch and relax
Dave: exactly
who cares if we bitch all night and day.. just get it out, vent till you're blue and enjoi yourself in the process
then you'll love life again
Preeti: hell yeah!
okie let's do it

posted by David Malloy @ 4:36 PM 0 Comments